Friday, April 15, 2011

What (not so little) boys are made of

Frogs and snails, that would be Josh. Puppy dog tails, well, neither Hunter or Josh, since I refuse to have a dog in the house at the current time. But these boys of mine are made up of plenty, that is for sure.

I remember well the baby shower I had when I was pregnant with Hunter.  There were many ladies there that I watched  raise a plethera of  boys.  I observed these boys growing under their mother's wings with compassion, stability, endurance, and a firm belief that they knew their mother's loved them.  Each of the women at my baby shower were given a piece of paper that said, "How To Raise A Boy".  Of course, there was still advice from my friends who did not have boys that were meaningful.  But I have always cherished the words that were given just for me from moms who had already experienced what I was about to.

There was a mom there, that raised 3 boys, and her advice was this.... "When your son becomes a teenager, and even maybe before, you'll be driving him around to many activities, take this time to talk with him, and have those conversations that you may not get a chance to otherwise."  She went on to say that her boys, at the end of a dance or school activity, always wanted to come back to their house to gather, which she said, made her feel good that her sons felt comfortable enough to bring their friends to their home.  I knew then and there, that was how I wanted it in my home.

Other words of the wise I received was from a very dear friend that I've remained close to for years. She told me that the relationship a mother has with her son is like none other.  I've always remembered that, and hoped that I would have the same kind of relationship with my boy(s) too, that she has with her son.  I would have to say that my boys are mamma's boys.  And I love it. I hope it will always remain that way.

When Hunter was very little, toddler age, he would tell me over and over, "I love you mama". That always made my day. I just loved hearing it.  When Josh was born, and up until he was about 2 or 3, whenever I would rock him or be feeding him, he would rub my neck and tell me all the time, "You're wonderful and beautiful." I've tried to get him to tell me those things now, but he won't.

I sing to my boys every night after they are tucked into bed, and have done so since they were born.  Hunter's 11, and Josh is 9, and can't get to sleep until I sing to them. I always tell them I love them before I leave the room, and Hunter will usually reply with an "Okay".  They've not been affectionate boys ever since they were about 3 or so, but just the other night Josh melted my heart.  After I sang to them, and told them I loved them, Josh replied, "I love you too." Now, I could confess and say that he was just so tired he probably didn't realize what he was saying, which is most likely the case, since it sounded pretty drowsy, but I don't care, I'll take it.  I loved hearing it.

So what is Hunter made of: #1 would have to be basketball, he loves to be active, is great in school with his studies, is pretty quiet, does not like the lime light whatsoever. But if you ask him to do something, he will do it. Like most other boys, he loves the Wii and his DS, is diligent in waking up at 6 a.m. every morning, taking his 30 minute shower, keeps me on my toes making sure I've signed all his homework, does his chores consistently, and loves to try new things.  He is also a very sensitive person, and gets upset when others don't follow the rules.

Josh is made up of a different sort: #1 for him would have to be his DS, he's doing great in school, not so interested in sports, pretty slow moving in the mornings, takes about an hour to finish his dinner, loves to draw and is great at it. He is one of the most creative kids I know, coming up with all sorts of contraptions, ideas, inventions, and discovering ways to do the most unusual things, like capturing a fly (in picture above) and attaching it to a string for his pet.  He is one funny guy.  He's always being goofy (which, doesn't always work to his benefit) but he can make you laugh with his silly faces and noises.  He can make so many strange noises with his mouth that no one else in the family can duplicate. He adores his littlest sister, which is so cute to watch. 

As my boys are entering a new phase in life, pre teen, I'm bracing myself with the new temptations that will come their way.  I'm hoping that I am teaching them what they need to know to withstand these temptations, and that they will feel comfortable talking to me about anything.  Over the years I have thought often of how very blessed I am to be a mother of boys.  They are wonderful. Of course I love my girls, and I do not love any one of them any more than another.  But being a mother to boys is a joy, and I am grateful that I'm having the opportunity be their mother.  

So as I look back on all those papers given to me at my baby shower, and remember all the words of advice given by experienced moms of boys, I like to think that maybe I'm becoming some of those moms who I look up to.  And if I had the opportunity to do the same thing for a new mom of a son, I would write all the things that were told to me, for they are coming true, to my delight.  

Because one thing is for sure, there is no relationship quite like that of a mother and son.

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